xxxxx from 2006 to 2012.

I'm sorry, specifically to you P, I don't know if you'd ever read this, but like you said on your blog, you doubt I'd ever come across your post but I did (ha, too bad), yeah I never thought or cared about you, treated you like a punching back, probably back then I was still a kid, never taking relationships seriously - fall get injured and say it's okay. You saw me through every heart break, you saw how T fell in love with R, you became my "bestfriend" when that happened, 3 years later after that sticky situation, I asked you the most ridiculous question and I still remember how you answered me, "I told you 3years ago and I'm going to say the same thing still, I love you" hahaha, come on I was a kid back then, how did you expect me to be.... serious on anything. It's heart breaking to see how someone waited for you yet you push them away cause their status writes nothing in it, it's funny how you stood by me and watch me fall just because you were that friendzoned area, but today, after years of heart breaks, I wanna tell you, thank you, thank you for watching me through all this emotionally nonsense, to be there for me and to watch me get hurt even though you could have walked away cause I pushed you out all the time, thank you for being that minimal bestfriend during my younger growing up days, I came across your blog and I learnt that 2012 was just last year, and having you to wait that long, must have been torturing, I blamed you for walking out thinking that you were being annoying but fact is, you never told me the truth and I finally learnt why today. I am sorry for hurting you, I know you're over every bit of me and you don't want to have any connection or relation with me, but you were a great friend to me - wherever you are, whatever you're doing now, I wish you all the best, the feeling all guys hated was the friendzone area sort of treatment and honestly you were that big brother I wished I had, it felt that way. I know the post was a year back, but you watching me grow up and being there, you were amazing.
Thank you P, for being that big brother, and I'm sorry for not being understanding and putting you on that rough spot, but I do understand, as much as you thought I was angry at you, I think I should have been the one begging for forgiveness instead.

Thank you great friend.

trip to the unknown island.

no kidding, I had no idea where  I went, but I sat on a ferry, went snorkelling, swam with fishes, fishing, tanning, diving. Yes and no it didn't feel so good either.

Yessssssss. I had very very very swelled eyes, and my mood swings were killing my whole family, well technically no one died. It was quite a horrid trip cause many memories came flowing back when we drove past an unforgettable road, how the first times there were started and so, but I told myself I'd be okay cause this wasn't a trip to feel any bit remorseful about. Everything is over. I lead a pretty horrible life. I guess everyone could agree with me, anyhow, I went to the mysterious island through the horrid ferry ride that made me feel utterly sea sick, :(. Oh, we arrived at the island and I tell you - I felt like I got scammed no kidding man, like everytime they said "on the jet's arriving, the boat's arriving" fuck it man, they arrive an hour later, ALL THE FREAKING TIME. Hahaha yes they do, but thank God it was just a day trip cause, my room felt worst than a motel, it was a hut, and the pictures looked so so so so so so pretty. But they looked horrifying when you step in, and the first thing I look for in the room would be the toilet and I swear, I stepped in three times only and I'd never ever want to go back in there, fucking gross I swear, dad wanted a refund since we booked it online and skip our way through by going to a way better looking hut instead, but nooooo we couldn't pffft. anyhow I didn't get any good photos this trip, yes it sucks I know but here goes:

So, I contemplated to post my pictures here or not since they were without make up and I really dislike using photoshop, but hopefully you don't judge my ugly face okay. (whatever, what's a trip without taking over fifty selfie(s) anyway, boys don't lik eto take photos you know, so being the only girl, #selfie #selfie #selfie)

okay enough.
Hahaha, I need to maintain alittle, too many selfie(s) may scare you guys away.
I need my rest so goodnight lovelies.

btw I missed the color run sign up, im really really sad now :(